Patrick Townsend — YOU BIG DUMMY!

The Ledger, a Florida newspaper reported Saturday that according to Polk County deputies, 30-year-old Patrick Townsend was stopped for driving without a seatbelt on Wednesday, and was found carrying 32.4 grams of methamphetamine in his boxers during the traffic stop. Before being transferred to the substation, Townsend told the deputy, “Dude, that ain’t —-. I deal with keys (kilos),” and according to a deputy affidavit, proceeded to go into detail regarding the grades and types of methamphetamine that he dealt with.

A second affidavit states that a recording was taken of Townsend’s confession and the digital recorder was placed on a desk in the lobby of the substation, where Townsend picked it up, placed it under his arm and when taken to the restroom, flushed the recorder down the toilet. Townsend who was handcuffed in the front, was returned to the lobby, and when he saw Detective Justin Starr looking for the recorder, he asked “What are you looking for Starr, your recorder?”, then he winked at the detective. When Starr asked what happened to the recorder, Townsend stated exactly what he had done. Townsend then stated, “You know what Starr, I did something I’ll never do again. I incriminated myself.” He then saluted the officers as he stated  “Tighten up on your job, homie.” Townsend is being held in the Polk County Jail without bail, charged with trafficking meth, possession of marijuana, and destroying evidence, among other charges.

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